BEARY SICK…

We’ll I’ve been sick in bed for a few days now…  I think my lawn mowing job pushed me over the edge.  This is nothing worse than being stuck in bed, I think I’m going stir crazy.  Started my ZPak, and will pick up the cough meds this evening.  

 

Why is it when we are sick like this we just want our mommies, no matter how old we are?  I remember my mom comforting me and making sure I was ok.    I wish she lived closer…

 

Thank goodness for good friends….

LAWN MOWING 101

Today was a very fruitful day.  It did start out slow with several cups of coffee and my puppers “The Girls” giving me the sad eyes to get out of bed.

I took a shower and packed them up in “Mini Pearl” (my car) and we were off to the beach!  They were singing and dancing!  Ok, uh, they were really running around like wild banshies, eating sand and poking at dead things with their noses.

Then we headed off to Home Depot to purchase a lawnmower.  As my neighbors used to come out and watch me mow with my weed eater – getting a good laugh… I don’t know how many times I ended up weed eating my own toes……  but I assure you, I was not going to let it happen again!

My yard is teeny tiny, so the cheapest lawn implement is quite all right with me.  High pressure tactics were used to get me to buy a self-propelled one, but I resisted the temptation.  I saw a storm rolling in, so I got it in high gear to get my lawn mowed before it hit… I’m tired of having a white trash looking yard (yes, my son’s car and motorcycle are in it… yup…  pretty sad…  GOOD NEWS:  I sold the car today)

I think my neighbors came out, because they heard an usual noise coming from my yard…  Whooping and hollering while I was trying to figure out how to start the damn thing… EUREKA!  A little mow here and little mow there… boop… boop… I’m done.

Yes folks, who needs a man when you can get out there in your bikini, high heels and the proper lip gloss to compliment your mower.  Just hold your head high and mow the hell out of it.

NEXT…….

Welp, showing ones true colors didn’t take long.  NEXT…..

Seriously considering becoming a lesbian….

WINNER! WINNER! WINNER!

Last night’s date was a success!  He was so nice, handsome and so well spoken.  Such a gentlemen, he opened the car door for me, we held hands and he gave me the most incredible kiss goodnight…  

Reality Check – it was a first date – but first impression was a THUMBS up.  

 

FIRST TINDER DATE…. FIRST IMPRESSIONS….

Well tonight is the night, I go out on my first Tinder date – I think I have luck on my side as this is also his first Tinder date. We have texted, but mostly talked on the telephone. I don’t know why, but everytime I talk to him, I feel like I am in a romance novel. You know the Jude Deveraux’esq masculine voice we all imagine the hero to sound like. 

Of course as women, we all have dreamy expectations.  Sometimes you have to wonder if meeting is even a good idea, because in your mind, you have created this Ah-MA-zingly perfect gentleman who would bend over backwards for you and be secure enough in his masculinity to carry your purse if he saw you struggle with it. 

Then there is the fear that he is an angel, so masculine you can smell the testosterone, so gentle that he could tame butterflies….

and you, yes you (me in this case)….. just feel like a little girl again, fumbling over your words, shy and insecure…. 

Trying to decide what to wear…  how to do your makeup, your hair, what color lip gloss (the most important part of the ensemble…. having the perfect kissing lips 😉

I wonder, do men go through the same worries and thoughts?

HEY CUTIE!

Minding my own business, I was on my way to get a cup of coffee when I stumbled upon a Cutie.  Just sitting there, all by itself on the floor.  Rather peculiar, wouldn’t you say.

I laughed because what I really thought was, someone just lost their mind, and there it was, just hanging out in front of the coffee bar.  I could not help myself, I rarely can in these types of situations, so I pulled out my trusty Sharpie and went to town!

 

FIRST CONTESTANT – FAIL!!!!

Meet Christopher, my first Tinder Contender.  He lives in the Jersey Village area and works in the airline industry…. RED FLAG {this red flag denotes the idea that Chris most likely has girlfriends in every country}.  While he is not my type (I’m a sucker for brown eyes), my sister tells me that I continue to date the same type of men, they just have different faces.  So, this is me, stepping outside my comfort zone:

We chatted last evening and he sure came off as a charmer.  After explaining the type of relationship I was looking for, he was right there with me!  He greeted me this morning with a “Hope you’re having a great day so far” and ended here:

 

 

RATE YOUR DATE – TINDER

Well, I know I said I was going to take a break, but I read this article about another woman’s experience on Tinder, so I gave it a whirl last night. I’ve heard mixed reviews, one person told me he has a few friends that actually met their long-term girlfriends on it, and then from the post I read, most just want sex (what else is new).

I will say, I think I am getting better at recognizing the nutty ones, as when someone says “ok, sweetie talk to you later” – I was like – Yea…. Riiiiggghhhtt… In your dreams. Or the ones who say right off the bat “you are very attractive”, “you’re so pretty”, “fyi, you’re sexy”, nauseates me. Why don’t they just come out and say what they are really thinking “Hey Sugartits, I just want to fuck your brains out and then never call you again”.

 So my plan is to post pictures and summaries of dates and I would hope you all would take the time to RATE MY DATE…  While I found this light-heartedly entertaining, I’m not holding my breath.

This Gives Me Hope

INNER GODDESS

We all have an inner goddess, the woman in us that is really our inner child – SCREAMING, YELLING and STOMPING her feet. She is young, vibrant and doesn’t take NO for an answer. She wants what she wants, when she wants it. She is a fighter, laws do not apply to her and she gets pissed at you for not listening.

She likes to seductively sip wine and wants to be known and adored. At the first site of danger, discord, hurt or vulnerability she rebels. When needed she can go from a cool calm to turbo-boost in 1 second flat. She cusses like a sailor but can also maintain a simplistic beauty that can be enjoyed when having a cup of tea with the Queen of England.

When she is happy, she purrrs, puts on a little lip gloss and prances around like a princess.

more to come….