Ode to the Drunk One Liners

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“You know you are my Brother…..”

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“You know, I am not drunk…..”

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“I can drive…..”

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“Please don’t be offended but….”

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“I respect you from my heart….”

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“I totally have your back, dude…..”

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“I fucking love you bro….” (Followed by the hand grab, chest bump, back pat, ass slap…whathaveyou. Repeat eight times before the night is over.)

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“What are you looking at?”

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“Is that your wife? (After he say’s ‘yes’. – you look at her and say) Lady, you can do a whole lot better than this. That’s a ‘mercy’ hump there….”

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“Hey! Hey!! Hey!!! Hey!!!! I’m talking to you….”

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“What did I tell you my name was?”

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“I swear to God and on my mother’s grave….”

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“No, but like, you are my best friend and I’m not just saying that because I’m drunk. I really do love you.”

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“and I’m not just saying this ’cause I’m wasted”

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“You’re so beautiful…”

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“Come here… seriously… come here….”

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“You wanna say it to my face?”

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“You’ve lost that lovin’ feeling…..”

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“Tell me brother what do you want? You want my life, take it.”

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“Bastard that girl is mine, look at her with respect.”

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“She doesn’t deserve you….”(meaning let me try to hit it)

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“What do you think I am drunk? I can drink at least another liter” (That one is for you Wills)

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“I can’t live without her.”

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“I love her man.”

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“I’m never drinking again!”

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“You know what’s good with vodka? More vodka”

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“That’s my song…”

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“You know what we should do….”

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“Yea, I tapped that….”

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“Fuck you, dude…”

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“Don’t taze me bro….”

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About Hiding2014-2016

2016 Life is what it is and you just have to get through it. 2014 I started blogging just a short time ago, it actually feels good. I've made some new friends and soliciting feedback from others who have experienced similar life events helps me to not feel so alone. So we all have bumps in the road, we make poor decisions - we are only human. It is these life experiences who make us who we are today. There is no need to have regret, just move forward. Ok, easier said than done, because as you read my profile, sometimes I take a step forward and then two steps back.

Posted on August 5, 2014, in My Life Over 40 and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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